Your Parasite.

I know you think this is as bad as it gets. I know you think this is rock bottom. It isn’t. There is no such thing. Life is not a sliding scale defined by how low or high you can feel. Whenever you want- you can make it better or worse. External forces don’t define who you are. You decide who you are.

You’ve been pounded down, you’re worn out. Your YOU has fallen into the background, and it’s hard to even see who you are anymore. I see you. It hurts to see you right now. You are amazing. You’re deep. You are compassionate. You are naturally positive, but right now that doesn’t seem to shine or come to you so easy. You give. You wake up early, you go to bed late. Nobody is coming out and being supportive. The ones that do offer support, you can’t fully come clean with and explain what is going on- because they “wouldn’t understand.” You turn on that smile for appearances, and turn it off when the door closes. When will it end? You wait for something to happen TO you.

It ends now. Stop. It’s time to make a decision. That person that is bringing you down is not welcome anymore. You are unevenly yoked. You are looking forward and (s)he is pulling you back. You want left and (s)he pushes right. You will not get anywhere by being attached to someone that never lets you make a path. Not acceptable. You are better than that. Close your eyes and picture yourself free of that negative, self serving, emotional leech. How do you feel? You can detach that parasite. You’re worried about being alone? Think about what is worse, being alone or being drained and dragged down, verbally abused and used. Plus, you aren’t alone. Just see how good it can be when you have yourself back with the freedom to make your own choices.

Every flashing blip of every moment is an opportunity for a fresh start, but they add up quick. The longer you wait the more you lose. I believe in you, we believe in you. You know what to do.